Raj was smitten by her. He did not want to be poetic, but he knew for a fact that she was the most beautiful girl he had known. Her name was Alicia, a fellow student in his program. Her curly hair, her freckled and smiling face and her beautiful eyes hidden behind her glasses; a smile would inadvertently pass Raj’s lips when he thought about her. But being the introvert he was, he never had the courage to ask her out. They were good friends, hanging out quite often and having long chats at parties or restaurants. However he wanted to tell her so much more. But he waited for the right moment.
It was their graduation day. Soon, his batch would get divided up into the many aspirations they had. Raj had plans of going back to India, back to his roots and family. They will keep meeting each other, they said, knowing quite well that might never happen. Raj realized that this might be the last chance he had to talk to Alicia face-to-face. If it were his last message to her, he wanted it to be of his feelings towards her. A fear cropped up in his head, "what if she does not like you?" "Well that is what we will find out then", he decided.
At the graduation party, he tried a lot to come clear with Alicia. Each effort being more difficult than the last. He needed to meet her alone, he panicked with people around. His shyness was getting the better of him. That night, when Alicia dropped him off at his apartment, he finally asked her out for a movie the next night.
“A movie as friends, right?” she asked.
Raj was taken aback. With some courage mustered up, he asked, “Was I that obvious?”
She smiled, “Maybe.”
His student days seem like a distant past, although it had been just 5 years. Raj has made good progress in his life. As the regional manager of a big IT firm in Mumbai, he was living the Indian dream. However one thing still eluded him.
He would still sometimes dream about that fateful night 5 years ago. He wanted to tell Alicia so much more, but some fear kept him from talking. He did ask her out for a movie, but the next day Alicia never called. He waited to hear all day. He hesitated from calling her up, a little bit of hurt ego does go a long way in wrong decisions. The next week he flew off to India. Not a mail from her, he thought, we could have remained friends.
His thoughts came back to him, as he stood wrenching the letter in his hands. He was facing the vast ocean at Marine drive, his refuge in times of sadness. The letter had arrived a few days ago. It was from the States, although it had been going around the world courtesy the decadent postal systems. It had his name written on top in a handwriting which seemed vaguely familiar. The sender just put the source address as being somewhere in California.
As he started to open the letter, a thought came to his mind. The handwriting was not just familiar. He was convinced for a moment that it was Alicia’s. When he last talked to a common friend he was told that she was still working in California. A wry smile came up on his face. "Did she finally realize that what I felt was not derogatory? Did she want to apologize and make up for lost time?" All the emotions he had stuffed into the back of his head came to him in a rush.
A moment later this was replaced with a hurt anger. If she did want to talk to him, why not give him a call or send an e-mail. "Why send a letter? Why send a message through such unreliable a source? And what does she want from me now?" After such a long time he was finally getting over her. He was already dating another girl and life seemed to be finally getting better.
As he stood wrenching the letter, he still hadn’t opened it. His mind was still undecided on whether to let Alicia back into his life again. Although there was still a chance that the letter was not from Alicia, he preferred not to consider this possibility. For sure the rationality of men is lost with love.
When he finally did decide, tears were rolling down his chin. He took a bottle he found on the street and stuffed the letter in it. And with a little hesitation he threw the bottle towards the water."So long Alicia", he thought,"I hope we could someday forgive each other."
The last thing he did remember was the sound of the waves beating down on his limp body. The bottle with the letter was still drifting away from him. He could hear fishermen shout at him, but he ignored everything and tried to swim towards the bottle. "If it were Alicia’s last message", he decided,"it is surely something to die for"
Friday, December 18, 2009
Saturday, November 21, 2009
Ballad of the Soldier (Into Hell)
We deny death,
It's rightful win;
My brothers and I,
That is our sin.
We pay for that,
With our blood and soul;
Till we finish the time,
That from death we stole.
And so over the hills,
We walk as one;
With a sword over the shoulder,
On which we sat our sons.
All bathed in blood,
More of others than our own;
We march ahead,
Without a cry or a moan.
Into hell we walked,
My brothers and I;
Until we win,
Or till we die.
Into hell we marched,
Convinced we will rise;
With courage and valor,
Hard to surmise.
Into hell we walk,
For people like you;
Just asking for prayers,
Not much, just a few.
Into hell we march,
My brothers and I,
Until we win,
Or till we die.
It's rightful win;
My brothers and I,
That is our sin.
We pay for that,
With our blood and soul;
Till we finish the time,
That from death we stole.
And so over the hills,
We walk as one;
With a sword over the shoulder,
On which we sat our sons.
All bathed in blood,
More of others than our own;
We march ahead,
Without a cry or a moan.
Into hell we walked,
My brothers and I;
Until we win,
Or till we die.
Into hell we marched,
Convinced we will rise;
With courage and valor,
Hard to surmise.
Into hell we walk,
For people like you;
Just asking for prayers,
Not much, just a few.
Into hell we march,
My brothers and I,
Until we win,
Or till we die.
Tuesday, May 26, 2009
Kharagpur Local : Good Samaritans
'My undergraduate life at the Indian Institute of Technology, Kharagpur would surely be one of my most cherished periods in life. Along with all the routine academic stuff, Kharagpur taught me a lot about life. One of the most effective modes of such a discourse was surely the rail journey from Kharagpur to Kolkata. In the two to three hours spent on the train, my favorite hobby was to observe the people traveling with me. And in the four years spent commuting I dare say I have built up a pile of stories and nuggets which might interest the reader. I plan to share these in a short story format. So sit back and enjoy... and to all my critics.. please bear with me !'
GOOD SAMARITANS
It was a hot and humid day as I made my way towards the railway station. The weather and my procrastinations had delayed my departure, and by the time I reached the station it was already well into the evening. One thing I hated about traveling then was the sheer overcrowding of the train. Evening meant office goers in Kolkata returning back to their homes, unfortunately peppered all along my route back to Kharagpur. Nonetheless I had only myself to blame. So mumbling and frowning I took a ticket for the Kharagpur Local and made my way towards the platform. Needless to say, the place was teeming with people. Although I am not averse to crowds, the weather made it undesirable.
The trick with traveling in such crowded places is to have proper seating. My personal favorite was the window seat; it gave me a perfect view and the superfluous winds made my journey quite pleasant. However today the fight for the perfect seat was going to be tough. Thankfully I was traveling light and I quickly searched for a place where I had a good chance to get the seat of my choice. The train arrived shortly and a melee broke out between the people boarding and the ones getting off. I maneuvered my way through the crowd and got my prize, a vacant window seat.
As I made myself comfortable the rest of the compartment was occupied by office goers heading back home. All the remaining seats were quickly taken up but for one. And this one seat is going to be the protagonist of the remaining story.
As the crowd settled down, it emerged that this lone seat had two contenders vying for its affection. Two men carrying bags and files came and stood on either sides of the seat. Sweating profusely and breathing hard, both men wanted to grab the seat but were restrained as if bound by some Lucknavi Tehzeeb (courteous behavior accredited to Lucknow residents). After a few seconds of pondering, one of them broke the silence.
"Aare Moshai, Aapni Boshun" (Mister, please have a seat)
"Are Na Na, Aapni Aage Eshechen Aapni Boshun" (No, no, you came first, you should have the seat)
"Aapni Seat Ta Aage Dekhechilen, Aapnar Bosha Uchit" (You saw the seat first, you should sit down)
"Ki Bolchen Moshai, Aapnar Shaate Eto Jinish, Bosha To Aapnar Uchit" (You have so much luggage with you, it is only proper that you sit)
"Kudi Bochor Dhore Ei Jinish Pottor Uthiye Cholchi Moshai, Ei Shorir Ekdom Tip Top" (I have been traveling with as many things for the past twenty years, my body is still in perfect shape)
"Ei Je To, Aapni Senior Maanush Uchit Aapnar E Bosha" (There you see, you are so senior, it only makes sense for you to sit down)
"Aare Senior Maane, Aapni Ki Bolte Chaan Ki Aami Budho Hoye Gechi?" (Are you implying that I am old?)
"Budho Naa Moshai, Aami Bollum Aapni Senior Maanush, Aapnar Bosha Dorkar" (Not old, I just meant you are my senior, you should sit down)
"Senior Wenior Chaarun To Moshai, Tokhon Theke Je Bolchi Boshe Porun, Aamar Kothar Je Dekhi Kono Daam E Nei" (Leave all the senior crap, I have telling you for such a long time, just sit down. You are simply ignoring me)
"Boshte To Aamio Bolchi Aapnake, Eto Jinish Othate Koshto Nischui Hochche, Boshe Porun" (I have telling you the same thing too. You must be feeling tired carring so many things, do sit down)
"Aapnar Cheye Beshi Koshto Hochche Naa" (Not feeling as tired as you)
"Aami To Ekhono Mojbut Aachi, Aapnar Boyeshe Aapnar Boshe Pora E Uchit" (I am totally fine, but at your age I must insist that you sit down)
"Ei Je Aabar Ulto Palta Shob Kotha, Bolchi Je Boshe Porun. Aapnar Cheye Beshi Dom Ei Shorire" (Do stop with all the nonsense, just sit down. This body still has more stamina than yours)
"Are Rege Keno Jaachen, Bhablum Aajke Ektu Charity Kori, Kintu Aapni To Otherwise Nichchen" (Why are you getting angry? I just thought I would be more charitable today, but you are taking it otherwise)
"Bodo Eshechen Charity Korte, Ekta Good Samaritan Bonun Aage, Ekta Seat Chere Je Ki Bishal Kaaj Korche Ke Jaane! Beshi Kotha Badhaben Naa To Moshai, Bolchi Boshe Jete..Boshe Podun" (First be a good Samaritan and then think about charity. I do not know how great you feel having sacrificed just a seat. Do not speak uselessly..Just sit down)
"Ei Je Insult Korben Naa, Boshte Ki Bole Diyechi Gorom Dekhache Ekhon" (Do not insult me, I just told you to sit and now you are acting so haughty)
And the discussion intensified. What started of as a show of extreme civility had now turned into something more heinous. But none of us came forward to issue a truce. It is not always that you get such great entertainment on the train. As their interchanges became more acrid, our smiles turned more angelic. The train went on, they continued their debate, the seat remained vacant and we kept smiling. It was literally a comedy of errors, a comedy life is just too good at.
The train stopped at an intermediate station and an old lady boarded the coach. Seeing the vacant seat, she rushed and grabbed it. The whole compartment broke into a muffled laugh. The two weary contenders now realized the futility of their debate, both of them turned away from each other, and the comic intercourse stopped as abruptly as it began.
The train marched on. The whole compartment bore a smile on their faces, expect for the two debaters and a confused old lady. I turned my face towards the window and the hot and humid weather felt a little better.
GOOD SAMARITANS
It was a hot and humid day as I made my way towards the railway station. The weather and my procrastinations had delayed my departure, and by the time I reached the station it was already well into the evening. One thing I hated about traveling then was the sheer overcrowding of the train. Evening meant office goers in Kolkata returning back to their homes, unfortunately peppered all along my route back to Kharagpur. Nonetheless I had only myself to blame. So mumbling and frowning I took a ticket for the Kharagpur Local and made my way towards the platform. Needless to say, the place was teeming with people. Although I am not averse to crowds, the weather made it undesirable.
The trick with traveling in such crowded places is to have proper seating. My personal favorite was the window seat; it gave me a perfect view and the superfluous winds made my journey quite pleasant. However today the fight for the perfect seat was going to be tough. Thankfully I was traveling light and I quickly searched for a place where I had a good chance to get the seat of my choice. The train arrived shortly and a melee broke out between the people boarding and the ones getting off. I maneuvered my way through the crowd and got my prize, a vacant window seat.
As I made myself comfortable the rest of the compartment was occupied by office goers heading back home. All the remaining seats were quickly taken up but for one. And this one seat is going to be the protagonist of the remaining story.
As the crowd settled down, it emerged that this lone seat had two contenders vying for its affection. Two men carrying bags and files came and stood on either sides of the seat. Sweating profusely and breathing hard, both men wanted to grab the seat but were restrained as if bound by some Lucknavi Tehzeeb (courteous behavior accredited to Lucknow residents). After a few seconds of pondering, one of them broke the silence.
"Aare Moshai, Aapni Boshun" (Mister, please have a seat)
"Are Na Na, Aapni Aage Eshechen Aapni Boshun" (No, no, you came first, you should have the seat)
"Aapni Seat Ta Aage Dekhechilen, Aapnar Bosha Uchit" (You saw the seat first, you should sit down)
"Ki Bolchen Moshai, Aapnar Shaate Eto Jinish, Bosha To Aapnar Uchit" (You have so much luggage with you, it is only proper that you sit)
"Kudi Bochor Dhore Ei Jinish Pottor Uthiye Cholchi Moshai, Ei Shorir Ekdom Tip Top" (I have been traveling with as many things for the past twenty years, my body is still in perfect shape)
"Ei Je To, Aapni Senior Maanush Uchit Aapnar E Bosha" (There you see, you are so senior, it only makes sense for you to sit down)
"Aare Senior Maane, Aapni Ki Bolte Chaan Ki Aami Budho Hoye Gechi?" (Are you implying that I am old?)
"Budho Naa Moshai, Aami Bollum Aapni Senior Maanush, Aapnar Bosha Dorkar" (Not old, I just meant you are my senior, you should sit down)
"Senior Wenior Chaarun To Moshai, Tokhon Theke Je Bolchi Boshe Porun, Aamar Kothar Je Dekhi Kono Daam E Nei" (Leave all the senior crap, I have telling you for such a long time, just sit down. You are simply ignoring me)
"Boshte To Aamio Bolchi Aapnake, Eto Jinish Othate Koshto Nischui Hochche, Boshe Porun" (I have telling you the same thing too. You must be feeling tired carring so many things, do sit down)
"Aapnar Cheye Beshi Koshto Hochche Naa" (Not feeling as tired as you)
"Aami To Ekhono Mojbut Aachi, Aapnar Boyeshe Aapnar Boshe Pora E Uchit" (I am totally fine, but at your age I must insist that you sit down)
"Ei Je Aabar Ulto Palta Shob Kotha, Bolchi Je Boshe Porun. Aapnar Cheye Beshi Dom Ei Shorire" (Do stop with all the nonsense, just sit down. This body still has more stamina than yours)
"Are Rege Keno Jaachen, Bhablum Aajke Ektu Charity Kori, Kintu Aapni To Otherwise Nichchen" (Why are you getting angry? I just thought I would be more charitable today, but you are taking it otherwise)
"Bodo Eshechen Charity Korte, Ekta Good Samaritan Bonun Aage, Ekta Seat Chere Je Ki Bishal Kaaj Korche Ke Jaane! Beshi Kotha Badhaben Naa To Moshai, Bolchi Boshe Jete..Boshe Podun" (First be a good Samaritan and then think about charity. I do not know how great you feel having sacrificed just a seat. Do not speak uselessly..Just sit down)
"Ei Je Insult Korben Naa, Boshte Ki Bole Diyechi Gorom Dekhache Ekhon" (Do not insult me, I just told you to sit and now you are acting so haughty)
And the discussion intensified. What started of as a show of extreme civility had now turned into something more heinous. But none of us came forward to issue a truce. It is not always that you get such great entertainment on the train. As their interchanges became more acrid, our smiles turned more angelic. The train went on, they continued their debate, the seat remained vacant and we kept smiling. It was literally a comedy of errors, a comedy life is just too good at.
The train stopped at an intermediate station and an old lady boarded the coach. Seeing the vacant seat, she rushed and grabbed it. The whole compartment broke into a muffled laugh. The two weary contenders now realized the futility of their debate, both of them turned away from each other, and the comic intercourse stopped as abruptly as it began.
The train marched on. The whole compartment bore a smile on their faces, expect for the two debaters and a confused old lady. I turned my face towards the window and the hot and humid weather felt a little better.
Saturday, May 16, 2009
Don't Leave Me Tonight
So finally inspiration returns to me... Not a post for more than a year.. I must admit my life has changed a lot this past year.. Finished college, joined another, found love, lost love, gained weight and lost some.. [:)]..But finally inspiration has returned to my life..and so this poem follows..Inspired by the song "Ab Na Ja" ("Don't leave now") by the rocking Indian Band "EUPHORIA"
When I close my eyes
I dream of you;
Your ever loving smile
Fresh as morning dew;
And I hear myself whisper
I love you;
When I close my eyes
I dream of you.
And then the morning comes
And you are gone;
And I wake up
Sad and forlorn;
It was a dream, I know
I have it every night;
But to me it is real
As real as my sight;
To me it is real
As insane as it seems;
I can be with you
Only in my dreams.
Only in my dreams
Can I hold you tight;
Make me a promise
Don't leave me tonight;
Let me be with you
Just another night;
Make me a promise
Don't leave me tonight.
You and I
May not be destined to be;
But I love you so
If only you would see;
But matter not
To you I belong;
My every thought
My every song;
But worry not
The stars, yellow and pale;
Listen to them tonight
They will tell you my tale;
If only, to tell you
I had the might;
Make me a promise
Don't leave me tonight.
And so I will wait
Till the stars make you mine;
When my love, from my dreams
Will become our sunshine;
And before you leave
To bring in the morning light;
Make me a promise
Don't leave me tonight.
When I close my eyes
I dream of you;
Your ever loving smile
Fresh as morning dew;
And I hear myself whisper
I love you;
When I close my eyes
I dream of you.
And then the morning comes
And you are gone;
And I wake up
Sad and forlorn;
It was a dream, I know
I have it every night;
But to me it is real
As real as my sight;
To me it is real
As insane as it seems;
I can be with you
Only in my dreams.
Only in my dreams
Can I hold you tight;
Make me a promise
Don't leave me tonight;
Let me be with you
Just another night;
Make me a promise
Don't leave me tonight.
You and I
May not be destined to be;
But I love you so
If only you would see;
But matter not
To you I belong;
My every thought
My every song;
But worry not
The stars, yellow and pale;
Listen to them tonight
They will tell you my tale;
If only, to tell you
I had the might;
Make me a promise
Don't leave me tonight.
And so I will wait
Till the stars make you mine;
When my love, from my dreams
Will become our sunshine;
And before you leave
To bring in the morning light;
Make me a promise
Don't leave me tonight.
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